ESTJ in an ISFJ world

I still remember the summer before freshman year of college.  I was perusing the plan II class catalogue and Professor Bump's class caught my eye.  It wasn't just that the reading selection was different.  I also felt like the short paragraph of the course description was somehow more formulaic and specified.  It turns out my hunch was right as Bump's myers-briggs personality pulls heavily from the sensing category which tends to be detail-oriented in providing directions.  And while that lines up perfectly with my personality categorization of ESTJ, there are other aspects which have proved quite the challenge.

"ISFJs are characterized above all by their desire to serve others, their "need to be needed,” according to Heiss." (2009)

For me, I have trouble relying on someone for any kind of help.  I'm self-reliant and have been so since I was a very small child.  I'll ask for clarification but very rarely will I request help.  I'm sure this has cost me as Professor Bump is very good about offering a variety of services to help our academic career.  For example, he's mentioned the Writing Center on campus both in the anthology and on the website as well as in person during class.  But I must say I've never made the time to visit and find out how I could improve my writing skills.

I didn't actually draw with a ruler but I was known to stack my slices of banana into 2 towers before eating them (and doing so by taking evenly from each tower so they remained the same height.)
http://www.greythinking.com/2010/01/24/perfectionism-as-a-career/

But that's really just peanuts compared to the main statement made in the more recent class assessment by Roo.  According to his research, "It’s time to tear off the shackles of oppression and “perfection” and embrace the ideas of Professor Bump’s Voltaire Coffee: destroy Plan II perfection!" (2011)  I must say, it's ironic that I'm just getting around to writing this blog, and I've recently had a change in opinion on this aspect of my life.

Specifically, my adherence to the perfectionism required for a pre-med student.  Every time I attend my plan II pre-med meeting, I'm constantly bombarded with the message that I should get all A's in all my science classes while simultaneously volunteering in a hospital and getting research experience and a whole other plethora of things to do.  I spent nearly my full first semester stressing about whether I was good enough to get into med-school.  And then this semester hit.

Chemistry seems to have me in a perpetual state of frustration with my imperfections.
http://www.campuscalm.com/premed_stress.html

I'm not going to lie, it hasn't been pretty.  I've done very well in all my classes except chemistry.  While that might not seem so bad, the problem is that there's a good possibility I'll get a C for the course.  As a perfectionist, that's something that's never happened to me before and it terrifies me.  But I feel like I've been able to keep from being swallowed whole by my fear and concern.  All thanks to coping skills I learned in Bump's class.

"Also, instructors should attempt to subvert the rigid ESTF’s meticulous attention to detail by making things crazy!" (2011)

In my opinion, world lit couldn't be any more insane!  Our plans for the day are usually sporadic and ever-changing.  In no other class do I experience such confusion as when I enter Parlin and take my seat at the round table.  Our discussions and activities range over such a wide variety that I'm never quite sure what to expect.  And that acceptance of things being beyond my control has slowly helped me come to terms for the fallibility of people (and of myself in particular).  I'm by no means saying I've given up work as a detail-oriented worker.  Only that I can allow myself a little slack in my ambitions.  I have a full four years (possibly plus some?) years of college and I should use them to explore and define what sort of career I want to hold.  College is not just a factory churning out medical students, it's a place to develop who you want to be.  I've just got to remember that next time I begin to panic over some ambiguous instructions or less-than-perfect score.